September 11

This will be a short post, but I needed to get out my overwhelming feelings about 9/11 right now.  As I'm sure everyone reading this post does, every year around 9/11 I remember where I was, what I was doing, and how scared I was that something had happened to my family.  In the face of all sadness, confusion, and pain, communities come together to support each other and provide shoulders to cry on.  I have felt it many times, and especially in the days, months, and years to come after 9/11.  However, as I was only in 7th grade at the time of the terrorist attacks I did not have the same overwhelming feelings of disbelief, vulnerability, and anger as I'm sure my parents, aunts, uncles, and teachers had.  I'm not sure if its that I'm older or that I'm away from home in a country that did not feel the impact of the attacks (or most likely, a combination of both), but when I was looking at pictures and reading stories on social media this morning at work, I started crying in a way that is uncontrollable. Specifically the pictures of individuals who were caught on the top floors of the buildings and jumping to their death, were moving me to tears in a way they haven't in the past.  As I wasn't directly impacted by losing a loved one and I don't remember getting emotional in the past around this time of year, I surprised myself with these emotions.

9/11 has come and gone and there has been no mention of it in Laos. I wish I was surrounded by the tight-knit community that was formed by these attacks so that I could feel the support that is still reverberating through American culture today, 13 years later. I've thought about all the 9/11 monuments and memorials that have been built, moments of silence conducted across the country, the individuals who lost their lives, the survivors, and everyone who knew people impacted. It is a very overwhelming day, that I think has just been exemplified because I don't have the emotional support and outlets that I would if I was in the US.  If I'm up to it, I will talk to my American coworkers today at lunch about this and see if they have had similar feelings.